Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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