The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Is it because I queefed?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Randomize
