i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
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