She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Randomize