I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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