Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
