just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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