you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
