and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
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