He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Randomize
