so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Randomize