New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
