you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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