This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
