It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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