I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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