Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
