is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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