Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
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