the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
