im drinking this country out of the recession.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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