So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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