yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize