And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
