Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
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