You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Randomize