in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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