More tranny stories later!
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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