More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
