White coat. Heels.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize