so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
