So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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