His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
