I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Randomize
