My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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