Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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