If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize
