i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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