I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I'm both gender and math confused
They left me at home... I'm a liability
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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