summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
