i wish my penis had a tongue
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize