# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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