we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.