And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Randomize
