If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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