Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
its not stalking. its research.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
me + whiskey = a bad person
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize