so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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