i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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