u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Randomize