Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
