Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
